No Time Like The Present
"You
are not the voice in your head – you are the hearer of that voice." –
Unknown
* * *
The
harshest critic most people will hear comes from the voice in their own heads.
It’s certainly true for actors. I could be on stage, in the midst of a
performance, everything going smoothly, the audience caught up in the play, but
in the back of my mind the reviews are not good. Self-judgment is sabotage.
That darn voice is pointing out every tiny imperfection in my work and creating
self-consciousness – which is the very definition of bad acting. “Don’t think
so much,” an acting teacher once told me, “just be.” I had no idea how to do
that.
This
is a problem for speakers as well as actors. Actors are the canaries in the
psychological coal mine. By parsing the emotional grammar of life, they can
illuminate behavior in ways that might not occur otherwise. Dealing with inner
demons is a case in point.
I
remember when I first became aware of the split in my mind. I was young and
green and needy and ambitious and neurotic. I was floundering to make my life
work, every failure a cue to despair, every success containing a fatal flaw. I
felt unfulfilled and frustrated, driven by the inner voice’s demands for
perfection, like a dog chasing its own tail. Fulfillment was an ever-receding
horizon. Success be damned, that inner critic was never satisfied.
Then,
one beautiful summer morning, I was driving down the Palisades Parkway with the
sunroof open, a Mozart piano concerto on the radio, and it suddenly struck me
that the only thing the universe actually required of me at that moment, was
that I drive along listening to the music and enjoying the sun on my face. The
voice was gone. I was supremely in touch with the moment, and the experience
was overwhelming. Tears streamed down my face and I realized that I could be
free of the inner critic. The voice was not me, or God, or life’s imperative
laying on a guilt trip – it turns out the problem was my mind.
I’ve
been reading a great book called The Power of Now, by Eckhart Tolle. He says
that in order to get into the present moment, you have to be out of your mind.
That is, as long as you are living in your mind, thinking, you are out of touch
with the now. If you think about it, you’ll see it makes sense. Thoughts are
“time-bound,” always else-when, caught up in the past or fantasizing about the
future – the present moment is that infinitesimally thin space between the two.
‘The Now’ is the absence of time, therefore the experience of NOW is
thoughtless. We in this culture have very few experiences of the present moment
because the constant yammering of our thoughts fill every nook and cranny of
our consciousness.
When
we are living in the present moment, thoughtless and simply being, we are as
close to enlightenment as it’s possible to be this side of the grave, says
Eckhart Tolle. The “egoic” mind exists in time, and time is the enemy of the
now. Joseph Campbell referred to the present moment as our only experience of
the eternal. Tolle calls it the absence of time, the end of suffering and the
real definition of enlightenment. In the now is where we are able to feel the
experience of being.
For
speakers, being is the purest communication. Emerson said “who you are being
speaks so loudly, I cannot hear what you’re saying.” ‘Being’ communicates by
itself. Imagine the impact of Phidippides, having run from the battlefield of
Marathon to deliver news of victory and peril before dying on the steps of the
Parthenon. Or remember Lou Gehrig, “the luckiest man on the face of the earth”
delivering a statement of grace and courage. It was his being that gave the
words such depth and meaning. You don’t even have to get the words right. Neil
Armstrong botched his line as he stepped onto the lunar surface, but who cares?
No
matter what the particular circumstances, there is always one thing that a speaker
shares with his or her audience – the present moment. The experience of being
human beings sharing the now creates in us the sense of unity with each other
that is the purest definition of communication.
A Thought to Ponder
"The
privilege of a lifetime is being who you are." - Joseph Campbell
©2001-2003
Michael F. Landrum
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